Man the barricades!

Man the barricades.

Halt the trains.

Stop the busses.

Hold the trains.

Close the airports.

Seal the Channel Tunnel.

Clear the streets.

Declare an emergency.

Mobilise the Civil Contingencies Unit.

Cancel all police leave.

Hold a COBRA meeting.

Pull the TV schedules for rolling news coverage.

Bring Kate Adie out of retirement.

Close the schools next week.

Notify the embassies.

Hold a special meeting of the UN Security Council.

Call an emergency plenary of the European Parliament.

Recall the British Parliament (if they are on recess – they usually are this time of year).

Clear the shelves at every supermarket for miles around.

There has been a very light dusting of snow in England.

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